


Life on a Knife's Edge

by MercurialParadox (gentledusk)



Category: The Hobbit (2012), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gender Roles, Genderfluid Character, Other, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-03-27
Updated: 2013-04-13
Packaged: 2017-12-06 15:48:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/737417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gentledusk/pseuds/MercurialParadox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She’s the rogue with the breeches and the spiked quarterstaff. He’s the thief with a dozen knives strapped under his dress.</p><p>And sometimes, Nori is just Nori the dwarf, born of the house of Ri.</p><p>Or, alternately: a story of Nori being a genderfluid BAMF, and a study of gender in dwarven society</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Whoever said growing up was easy?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who wants to be proper, anyway?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: In this story, the pronouns used to refer to Nori reflect whether Nori identifies more strongly as male or female at the time. Initially, she is not yet aware of the possibility of identifying as anything other than female.
> 
> I owe my headcanon of Nori having a cool uncle mentor to greenkangaroo, and the inspiration to write genderfluid Nori to Sister_Wolf. Go read their Nori stories, they are beautiful.

When Nori is a young dwarfling, all she hears is cooing about what a fine young lady she’ll grow up to be. If she’s inherited her mother’s good looks and her father’s charm, then she should have no trouble attracting a husband when she comes of age to make sure that the house of Ri endures.

Instead, Nori turns out to be quite the little troublemaker, getting into all sorts of mischief. Her father scolds her for not acting “as a proper young lady of the house of Ri should” and says something about respectability and family honour that Nori promptly disregards. Her mother is convinced that her fondness for pranks and roughhousing is a phase that she will grow out of. Her uncle just laughs and says that she must take after him as he slips Nori her favourite sweets when her parents aren’t looking, along with a new pair of breeches, just her size.

Uncle Riori is the  _best_.

She doesn’t understand her parents, really. The boys she plays with are much more fun than any of the dwarflings her mother tells her to play with—they wrestle and play pranks and find all the best hiding spots in the city.

As she grows older, though, she begins to notice the dwarves around her starting to treat her differently. The boys she used to play with when they were younger refuse to do much of anything with her now, not even when she sneaks out to play with them again against her father’s wishes.

“Well, you’re a female,” one of the boys says when she asks them why they won’t play-fight with her any more. “Papa says that lasses are meant to be protected by us lads. It wouldn’t be a fair fight, really, not with how much stronger I'm sure we are than you.”

The boy gets a bloody nose and a bruised ego for his troubles. The nerve of him, thinking that females are weak! How ridiculous. Nori is sure that she’s done the town a favour by taking him down a notch. The rest of them take one look at her defiant glare and her bloodied fist and run away as fast as their legs can take them. No doubt they will make up a story later about the fearsome gang of big, burly dwarves they faced down, instead of admitting that they were cowed by a lone dwarfling girl.

“You are a young lady, Nori,” her father lectures for the umpteenth time when she arrives home afterwards, “Sneaking out and starting street brawls is highly improper behaviour for a young dwarfling. Remember, one day you must grow up and get married, so you must start acting like a proper dwarf, so you can have children one day for the good of our family line, like your brothers will as well.”

“I don’t want to get married!” she cries vehemently, “I want to be like Uncle Riori! I want to learn to fight and pick locks and go on adventures!”

The argument that follows results in her being sent to her room without supper for the third time that week. Not even the bits of food that Dori sneaks her make it any better.

“There’s no shame in being a proper dwarf, Nori,” Dori, the most proper dwarf in the history of dwarves says, “Why don’t you go back to your lessons?”

And she tries, she really does, because she is still at a young enough age that she still cares about what her older brother thinks. She tries, but maybe she just hasn’t got the head for it because her lessons are excruciatingly dull. She tires of the whole affair soon enough, and not even the thought of Dori’s disappointed face can stop her from wishing for some excitement in her life.

~

“Teach me to be like you, Uncle Riori,” she begs on another one of his short visits. Uncle Riori’s life sounds much more exciting than her father’s or mother’s. Perhaps that is why they don’t approve of how much she idolizes him. They never were fond of fun things.

Her uncle smiles at her indulgently, as always, but there is a lingering sort of sadness in his eyes as he looks down at her. “You’re young yet, my gem. There’s still plenty of time for you to decide what you want to make of your life. Ask me again when you’re a little older, and we’ll see.”

The sting of his refusal is soothed somewhat by the padded vest he gives her before he leaves. “It’s not a corset, gem,” he says with a laugh when she makes a face at it, “See the padding? Tie it tightly, but not so tightly that you can’t breathe, you hear?”

He never says what the vest is for, not outright, but Nori knows. The next day, she puts on her breeches and her new vest and goes out to find some excitement.

~

The first time she steals something, it’s to initiate herself into a gang. It’s just an apple from a market stall, nothing beautiful or valuable, but it still sets her heart hammering wildly in her chest and adrenaline thrumming through her veins.

The second time she steals something, she thinks she could get addicted to this feeling. The rush of the wind against her face, the slap of the cobblestones beneath her feet, the risk of being caught—all of it gives her the best kind of thrill, the excitement that she’d craved.

By the tenth time she does it, the gang knows she’s not really a male like she dresses as, but she’s lighter on her feet than any of them and she knows how to use her looks and charm to her advantage. The fact that she takes down their leader with a few well-placed punches after he tries to protest also helps. They don’t question her after that. Instead, they plan out new tactics for their heists that take full advantage of having a female in the group. Nori thinks this is a very practical idea, much better than discussing how many children she’ll have one day like her parents do, and she participates enthusiastically.

The sixteenth time she steals something, she gets caught. She supposes it was bound to happen sooner or later, what with them being rank amateurs at thieving, really. It’s not the getting caught that is the worst part, though. The worst part is that the merchant who drags her home proceeds to firmly tell off her parents for not raising their son better, in full view of the whole street.

Even the sight of her mother’s pursed lips and her father’s stony glare cannot quench the odd ball of warmth that settles in her chest at the word “son”. She is a daughter, yes, but there’s just something about that word that feels…nice, somehow. It is what gets her through all the shouting that follows about propriety and honour and shaming their family. Little Ori cowers in the corner of the room, brown eyes wide and frightened-looking, though for whom she cannot say, and Dori hovers at his side anxiously, torn between looking disapproving and looking like he wants to fuss over her like the overprotective older brother he is. There is talk of chaperones, of getting rid of what must be Uncle Riori’s influence on her behaviour, and of forbidding her from associating with “those ruffians” again. She is then sent to her room like she is a young dwarfling again.

In the morning, Nori is gone. The only signs of her departure are the open window in her room and the note to Dori left on her bed.

 _Take care of Ori_ , it says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Since Nori identifies more strongly as male in general, despite being born with a "female" body, I’ll be defaulting back to “he” for the sake of convenience whenever Nori isn’t identifying as female (so not only when he identifies as male, but also when he’s just not…female). This is certainly not the case for all genderfluid/genderqueer people. Yes, I am aware of gender-neutral pronouns, and power to those who use them, but writing a story using them felt awkward to me. Maybe they will become a part of everyday language one day though, who knows.
> 
> The Dwalin/Nori will happen eventually. They will meet in the future, I promise! If you caught any spelling/grammar errors, please let me know so I can fix them <3
> 
> Next: where did Nori go, exactly? Or rather, who did she go to? Well...who do you think?


	2. Who are you?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nori could count the number of people she trusted with her feelings on one hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still looking for a beta to help me out with canon stuff, avoiding using too many clichés, story flow, etc. I edit my work multiple times, but you miss things when you're attached to the story you're editing.
> 
> Nori's still fairly young at this point, maybe a teenager in human years? Anyway, she's had a pretty emotionally stressful day.

 

Nori doesn’t look back, and her feet are sure and steady even high up on the rooftops at night. She’d mapped out all the escape routes from their house a long time ago.

It takes her some looking, but eventually she finds the place she’s searching for.

“Nori?” Riori asks, clearly surprised to see her turning up out of the blue (or black, really, considering how dark it is outside) in the dead of night. Her uncle doesn’t always live in the same place, but he’d told her how to find him if she really needed to. He recovers from his initial shock quickly and ushers her inside.

“What is it, my gem?” he asks quietly when she does not immediately speak, and suddenly the whole story comes tumbling out, the gang and the thieving and the dressing-down from her parents, the fights about proper conduct and feeling she got when the merchant called her their son.

She half-expects a scolding again, even though Uncle Riori was never one for lectures (unlike Dori, who thinks he knows everything, the git). Instead, Riori just listens to her with a grave expression on his face, looking far older than he ever has in all her memories of him up to this moment. Uncle Riori is not someone she usually thinks of as old, despite the many years between them, but there’s something about the way he’s looking at her now that ages him in Nori’s eyes.

Looking back on it now, she thinks that it must have been quite the conflicted expression he'd had on his face. To know that his niece would be following in his footsteps, to know that she would be in constant danger for the rest of her life. The desire to keep her safe, combined with the heavy knowledge that if he didn’t teach her, and teach her well, she would end up dead all the sooner, because they both knew in their hearts that Nori would never really be able to give up being a thief. Riori knew, because he was no stranger to that same thrill, chased it all his life just as Nori did.

Right now, though, Nori knows none of this. She tired and shaking and just feels completely wrung out, and though she feels like she could drop off to sleep right there on the floor the lingering tension in her from reliving the events of today draws her as tight as a bowstring waiting to snap.

“Is there something wrong with me, Uncle Riori?” she whispers, hoarse and exhausted after her rant, she’d stopped caring about her parents’ opinions of her long ago, but uncle Riori may as well be her father for how much she looks up to him, and she can feel her long-held confidence in herself starting to crumble. What will she do if there really is something wrong with her? What if it’s something that can’t be fixed? She feels tears start to build up in her eyes despite all the time she spent learning to suppress them and inwardly curses at herself. She will not cry, she will not cry, she _won’t…_

“My jewel,” Riori says, tipping her chin up to look into his sombre eyes, “there is nothing _wrong_ with you. If you must be a thief, than a thief you shall be, for it would be most hypocritical of me to tell you otherwise. I doubt you would listen to me if I did, would you?”

Nori doesn’t know any more. Uncle Riori is probably the one person who could change her mind. The rush, the thrill, the _excitement_ —could she give it all up? Could she give up something so engaging, something that she actually has talent for, to lead a regular life?

“No,” she says, shaking her head, and Riori smiles at her sadly.

“Aye, I thought not. You always were a particularly headstrong one, my lass, but there is nothing, _nothing_ wrong with you, you hear? As you go through life, certain people will think they know how you should live, but they can’t be the ones telling you who you are. If you feel like a lad, then you are a lad, simple as that. If you are a lass, then a lass you are, no matter what anyone else says.”

“And what if I don’t know what I feel like?” she asks, her voice wobbly. “What then?”

Her uncle smiles at her gently. “Then you can just be Nori the dwarf, born of the house of Ri. But even I can’t tell you who you are. It’s something you’ve got to discover on your own. “

Nori does burst into tears then, but Uncle Riori doesn’t frown at her for “acting childish” like her parents did. Instead, he simply holds her close and strokes her hair and waits patiently for her to calm down.

“Teach me to be like you, Uncle Riori,” she begs afterwards, like she did years ago. This time, he agrees.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Once again, the idea for Riori comes from greenkangaroo’s fic Dirty Deeds (Done Dirt Cheap), because that fic is awesome and sometimes I forget that it's not actually canon. Also, hi greenkangaroo, please tell me if you think they are too similar, I don't want to steal your character!
> 
> My headcanon: Riori may be on the more morally dubious side of the law sometimes, but when it comes down to it he really does care about his family. He knows that, even if he tries to protect Nori from the criminal side of life, sooner or later Nori’s going to get drawn back in. And he’d rather have Nori go in prepared.
> 
> Next: Nori learns the ways of the rogue and interacts with some deadly ladies. 
> 
> I haven't decided whether to genderbend Dwalin yet. Or whether this story will involve a harem somehow in the future. Somehow. Obviously my mind is preoccupied with important things *hides behind calculus textbook*


	3. Obligatory training montage, away!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nori gains some morally dubious (but still totally awesome) mentors, and meets someone unexpected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: It felt weird changing Sori’s name, but it felt weirder to continue using it due to Sori already existing (beautifully) elsewhere. Therefore, I’ve changed Nori’s uncle’s name to distinguish him as a separate person, before this story gains too many chapters. My apologies! It should be noted that Riori still totally owes his existence to greenkangaroo.

Nori gradually becomes a full-fledged thief under his uncle’s guidance. He learns to pick locks and escape bonds, how to throw his voice or move without a sound. He learns how to conceal weapons and disguise himself and how to hide in the shadows. He learns how to avoid the guards and how to flirt his way into someone’s good graces. He turns out to be so good at the last one that Riori laughs and calls him “his little heartbreaker”. His uncle never once speaks of marriage, or propriety, or finding a respectable craft.

Nori also learns that some days she is a lass and some days he is a lad and some days Nori is both, or neither, simply Nori the dwarf.

“Why do you never call me ‘niece’ or ‘nephew’, Uncle Riori?” he asks one day. Riori always says that he is Nori’s uncle, or that Nori is his protégé instead.Though not terribly unusual, Riori’s avoidance of the words is noticeable enough to Nori. Perhaps it is simply for the sake of convenience. Today Nori’s braids are neither masculine nor feminine and carry absolutely no meaning at all, which is quite the feat in dwarven culture, considering how much one can tell about another by their braids.

Riori looks thoughtful for a moment, as if the question had never occurred to him before. “I suppose it’s because you’re my niece sometimes, and my nephew other times, but no matter what, you are always my gem. You are very precious to me, Nori. Like the child I never had.”

If Nori’s eyes are suspiciously bright as they work together to intercept their target, then Riori is good enough not to mention it.

~

“Not as good as Bianca here, but it’ll do,” says the odd blond dwarf inspecting Nori’s crossbow. He gives Riori a nod over their drinks. “All right, I’ll teach him.”

It might just be Nori’s imagination, but he is almost certain he can feel the weight of several stares in their direction focusing on the blond dwarf’s chest, showed off by the deep V-neck of his tunic.  Despite his lack of beard, he supposes the dwarf does have rather nice chest hair.

If he is a bit distracted during their shooting session, no one has to know the exact reason, right?

~

“But when will I ever need to act like part of a _harem_?” Nori asks.

“You never know!” says the dwarf in front of him, with a mischievous glint in her eyes, and a tone that is far too cheerful-sounding for someone who’d just taken him for a practical application of poisons.

“Why a _harem_?” he persists.

“To get close to royals with your exotic dancing skills?” the dwarf, Mithra, replies. Behind her, Riori’s other friend, Nyr, seems to be shaking with silent laughter. Is this his uncle’s idea of a joke? “In any case, it never hurts to have this kind of knowledge. After all, your very own uncle Riori did it to infiltrate a foreign palace once. The nobles there couldn’t take their eyes off of him!”

“Mithra!” Riori protests as Nori chokes on his drink, spraying liquid everywhere.

“Quite a sight he was too, all prettied up in gold and silks—” says Nyr.

“I thought we agreed never to speak of that again!”

“You really should wear red more often, it complements your arse.”

“Mithra!” Riori says again, sounding scandalised, as Nori is attacked by another coughing fit. “Nori is right there!”

“Oh, I’m sure red would complement Nori’s arse too,” she says blithely, ignoring Riori’s sudden choking. “Maybe something in burgundy…” she breaks off abruptly as she bursts into peals of laughter, unable to contain herself any longer at the sight of Riori’s expression.

Riori’s palm is kneading his forehead now and his face is turning an interesting shade of red, though Nori can’t tell if it’s from exasperation or embarrassment, or possibly a combination of both.

~

“Threesomes?” Nori asks dubiously. He would accuse Riori of setting him up for all this, if it weren’t for the fact that his uncle’s friends seem to enjoy winding him up even more than they enjoy teasing Nori.

“You never know, there’re all sorts of people out there, and not just dwarves!” Nyr says, his mouth curving upwards into an impish smile. “Why, one time, Riori had to—”

“And _that_ ,” Riori cuts in, undoubtedly saving him from a mentally traumatic experience, “is a story that Nori really doesn’t need to hear. Ever.”

“Aww, but how will the lad learn to follow your shining example?” Nyr protests, pouting. Riori elbows him in the stomach. “Fine, fine, Master Thief. Come on now lad, give us your best ‘get-out-of-trouble-free’ look.”

Nori puts on his best wide-eyed, wobbly-lipped kicked puppy look, slouching his shoulders to look less threatening and looking up through his lashes.

Riori laughs. “How could anyone resist that face? Alright now, Nori, give us your most charming smile.”

Not wanting to disappoint his uncle, Nori channels all his powers of persuasion into his smile, laying the charm on as thick and sweet as syrup. _Don’t worry,_  his smile says, _you can trust me. I know what you like, and I know how to give it to you. Don’t you want to find out?_

“Oooh, right to the heart!” Nyr says, clapping a hand to his chest and pretending to swoon.

“Well, damn,” Mithra says, whistling, “You really have inherited your uncle’s charm. Looks like we’ll have another swathe of broken hearts cut through the city! I reckon you could have half the trainee guards swooning over you by the end of the day.”

“Even that big, scary one with the mohawk?”  

“Is that a challenge?” Nori asks, arching a brow.

Nyr chuckles, holding his hands up placatingly and changing the subject. Riori just looks amused.

~

Nori is taking a break from another sparring session with her uncle when she sees a dwarf with long, dark hair and a beautifully braided beard coming down the path towards them.

“Lady Dís!” Riori exclaims, jumping to his feet. Nori stiffens in alarm. The princess? Here? What’s going on? Does she know who they are?

“Peace,” Dís says, smiling reassuringly at her. It’s rather terrifying, actually, and Nori wonders if she is aware of it. “I hereby deny all allegations of any consorting with _this_  rapscallion,” she points at Riori, “and any of his associates. In return, I expect, as always—”

“My wonderfully dubious services,” Riori says with a sweeping, exaggerated bow, “and any new knowledge pertaining to your relations. As well as, if I recall correctly, the denial of any knowledge of my lady’s secret trysts with a certain dwarf—”

“You make it sound so scandalous!” Dís huffs, “He’s a perfectly respectable dwarf! You are also to tell no one of my neglecting to read up more on court etiquette as a result of this meeting.”

“But my lady, however will you learn proper manners?”

Dís shoves at him. “If anyone needs lessons in manners, it’s that hardheaded brother of mine. I’m sure he’s convinced that looking all solemn and majestic is the solution to everything. But enough about manners. I understand that Nori and I have some sparring to do?”

Sparring? With the princess? Well, today just gets more interesting by the second. Nori wonders how Uncle Riori even met Dís in the first place.

“The story of how we met is a long one, to say the least,” Riori says in response to her unvoiced question. “It certainly didn’t happen in the most conventional of ways.”

Nori thinks for a moment. “Did it have anything to do with harems? Or threesomes? Or exotic dancing?”

Dís perks up immediately. “What’s this? Tell, tell!”

Riori sighs and massages his temple. “I’m never going to live those times down, am I?”

Dís just gives an undignified snort in response.

~

Nori ends up dual-wielding short swords for this match at Riori’s request. She’s never used short swords before, but she supposes they could be treated as very long knives. She tries her best with them, but in what seems like no time at all Dís has managed to knock both of her swords out of her hands. On top of that, Dís now has one arm around her waist, pinning her arms with it, and her sword against Nori’s throat, trapping her in this hostage-like position.

“Yield,” Dís commands, and Nori swallows, suddenly very aware of the solid line of Dís’ body pressed up against her back, and the very _sharp_  edge of the blade hovering in front of her neck.

“I yield,” Nori says hoarsely, and if she has a tiny (very tiny) crush on Dís for about a week after that training session, well, she thinks she can be forgiven. Who could blame her?

~

He stands in front of the mirror in the dimly-lit room, arranging his hair carefully with the pins that double as lockpicks. He straps an assortment of knives and daggers all over his body and pulls a long-sleeved, burgundy-coloured dress over the weapons, admiring the way it conceals all his blades. The final weapon, a sheathed stiletto from Riori, goes down the front of his dress and into the cloth that’s wrapped around his breasts. Just in case.

Just before he disappears into the flickering shadows, he flashes a quick, cheeky smile at the mirror, as bright and deadly as a dozen blades gleaming in the sun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poll time: Should Riori still be alive later on in this story, when Nori is older? 
> 
> I think I really am going to end up making Dwalin female, just to explore the way Nori and Dwalin would interact. Not sure still. I haven’t seen fem!Dwalin/fem!(ish)Nori yet though, so it could be interesting to write.
> 
> Cookies to anyone who can tell me who the cameo in this chapter was!


End file.
